days like this i miss my piano

its days like this i miss my piano.. sigh...


...

so there i lie in my room.
finding it hard to believe that i could lie
amidst all the tension and frustration
builidng up all around me
in the air of my room
in the air of my breathe
inside my lung, suffocating me
diffusing into the air of my circumstances
which was really just the cherry
on the cheesecake, i refused to advertise.
but the difficulty swallowing the truth
was conviniently avoided in time
with the welcoming of a new truth,
that perhaps in fact, i wasnt lying.
I was flying two inches above every
space and corner of my room
swimming and contorting in my magical
hell hole of freedom.
my screams, in last ditch efforts to empty
my breathe from the pressure
had the inverse result of filling my room with so
and so created the necessary physics,
for my defiance of gravity, and the phenomenon
of intelligent falling was momentarily halted
to break my body from the chance to lie.
because i wasnt meant to lie.
no, no, of course not. how could I.
with such immense heaviness
coupled with this overwheliming air of duty
surrounding this inner frustration
(yes i know, ive already said that,
sorry if that just so happens to be
the best word i can use to sum it all up
at the moment), what right did i ever have
be it divine or constructed by man, to lie down.
lies. lies. lies. i mean noo. but yeaah. i know its true.


sigh.


and so when the hurricane ends,
and my body finally stops resisting this
magnetic repulsion, i levitate out of my incline
to a vertical view of my window
where the stillness of the woods
and the stoic calm of the omni-potent
ocean's horizon offers me a cold slap.
for who knows. it just might help taking
life in perspective.. but no.
i gracefully decline. cause, in all frankness
my life is just that- MINE. and if i cant
bring peace to myself, then thats just too bad.
time is all i need. time and my room of
frozen tension to sort out my mind, before
i see myself fit to open my room window
and let my breathe get taken away, again.


----