The poems start coming back

Why i hate becoming popular.
Un-cohesiive rambling by rishik vijay menon.

and i dare say
that things change only when you stop noticing them
or at least in my case
cause i was simply too caught up
trying not to lie
and trying not to, not try
but still reach the same results
cause as my friends woudl all agree
with me. yes, little me.
its all about the pride
and i would fight for all that i dont want to lose
and at the moment of thinking and not thinking
and as the situation and course of events happened
i knew i had just lost control
and i still know it wasnt my fault
and i wont let it haunt me,
but it wont let me, be free
so i hide.
away into dark complex stories and
folds of half truths, to avoid facing the reality
into a convenient little gap of green and squares
where i didnt plan to end up in,
but, rather coincidentally too, i might add
found myself waking up to, so that i could
not quite start anew
but merely avoid the taint and the kink of
what i would claim
as my so call reputation
or please, dont say its stained.
and please dont claim im famed
cause that can only mean
that the ghost of accident
and the stench of embarassment
has found its way back to me
where the high profile
of my life cant be shown without the
swirling mass of something, decomposing slowly in the backyard
falling onto my ego, and smearing and destroying
in one huge blow
destroying the little defenses and
sources of comfort i have built up
over this stint of time.
so ill just save a dime,
and possible future misfortunes
and the dangerous risky possibility
of the slippery slope
and falling head first from
way up high mountain tops
and take the plunge myself
cause its better to leap
then to look, and ponder
and be pushed from behind,
anytime. so join me.
and lets spare ourselves
future misery and self-torment
by executing this task right now.