Never. No one ever will . that bit of me which call me. that individuality. that crappy me-ness in this life. cause thats all we can hold on to. you cant hold onto someone else. theyw il change. you cant place your hopes and dreams in a soccer team. its stupid. you cant even have faith in home or in places of worship. cause things change. no matter how hard it is to accept. you just cant have trust in anyone. but yourself. cause no matter how much the world changes, you will always be who youa re. you will always be within you. and no one can take it away from you. and no one will. its the last key of security all of us have.
listening to take it away by the used. haha. they rock. screamo. sigh. doesnt get any better, than raw emotion coupled with strong melodic shapes. of course when it comes to lyrics you cant beat dashboard confessional. he is the master. haha. sigh. i dotn know why i am typing about all this. maybe its just to divert my attention from the real shit at hand. the reason why i havent been posting for the past few days. the prelims. and the worst card it coudl ever draw on me. The add maths papers. sigh.
IT WAS THE WORST. oh my god. even if by your grace i get all my marks for my attempted questions, i still fail. cause i was just too stupid. just too unprepared. just too slow. sigh. dam add maths. tuesday after add maths i went with to macs with selvam to study tamil. it was real good. a crahs course onto the foundation of tamil. hope i score today. sigh. monday after school i went with arthur and jeremy to MP library tos tudy. think i already mentioned that i think. sigh. i dunno.
haha. sigh. bio was not oo bad today. mcq of course. josh was talking about full marks. puts em to shame. sigh. went to BK with kyle, eng tai and shane fer lunch before our CLB paper. then josh, kyle, alex and myself broke into the ava room. ahha. it was cool. and tehn we explored the old un used dressing rooms behinf the hall and josh pulled the fire extinguisher trigger. haha. and kyle and josh were playing carom while me and alex were on the piano. haha. we were talking, and scheming and dreaming about after the Os. our big plans and ideas for brekaing into school and sleeping on the school roof and sigh. woudl just be soo perfectly cool. sigh. tamil B paper went well i think. thanks selv.
went home straight after today. dad was picking me up. would had rather gone out with jeremy and co. of course. bleah. just that dad was feeling intererish today.
hahas. sigh. i guess i havent exactly been studying alot. wont be surprised if i get dismal results. i mean i was playing piano alot. and going skating. and solving mensa word puzzles. sigh. stupid stupid stupid. oh well. i am NOT goign to regret. cause this is life. its my life. and i chose it this way. so yes. ahha. no regrettingt for this 16 year old. sigh.
teh anticipiation is killing me. tomorrow is class photo taking day. its so stupid that the sec 4s dotn have teh old class photo thingy. and that we have to make our own. dam school.
im sick. bad cold. sneezing alot. crappy. sigh. i want to watch lords of dog town. and the corpse bride. but some how everyone else wants to watch the grimm brothers. boo hoo. im not watching. so there. haha. se how i guess. not reall interested, ill give you that. sigh. thinking of donating blood. will ask around. so maybe a bunch of friends can go togetehr. ahha. yeah. just donate blood. haha. how fun. im serious about this too, by the way.
not in the writing mood. sick. crappy. so im sorry if i sound uninterested. or fucked up. or full of attitude. but yeah. im sorry. seriously. im losing touch with soemthing. i dunno what. maybe its my mind. i dunno. not in the rgiht frame of mind at all. sigh. so here is the solution. next time i cant reply properly. i wont reply at all. makes the most sense. sigh. feeling like shit now. coudlnt even go out today after my tamil. so...sudden. and surreal. sigh.
byes.
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